What Do William Shakespeare, The Big Lebowski, and a T-Shirt Have in Common? A Novel-T Contest!

Posted by Patrick Ridings on December 05, 2015 1 Comment

As promised, Novel-T brings you exciting contest news! We’ve teamed up with author, filmmaker, and all-round pop culture junkie Adam Bertocci to challenge your literary, film, and creative sensibilities.

We’re offering two fans a chance to win a copy of Two Gentlemen of Lebowski signed by its creator (Bertocci – not Shakespeare), as well as Novel-T's William Shakespeare literary t-shirt jersey. To do so, all you need is a little knowledge of Elizabethan drama, your favorite book or movie, and some creativity. Novel-T wants you to take your favorite film or literary quote and recast it in the Bard’s style, as Adam and we have done. For example:

The Dude
Let me explain something to you. Um, I am not "Mr. Lebowski." You're Mr. Lebowski. I'm the Dude. So that's what you call me. You know, that or, uh, His Dudeness, or uh, Duder, or El Duderino if you're not into the whole brevity thing.
...becomes...
THE KNAVE
Let me not to the marriage of false impressions deny impediments. I am not Master Lebowski; thou art Master Lebowski. I am the Knave, call'd the Knave. Or His Knaveness, or mayhap Knaver, or mayhap El Knaverino, in the manner of the Spaniard, if brevity be not in thy soul nor wit. A Knave by any other name would abide just as well.

Or:

John McClane
Yippee-ki-yay, motherf----r!
...becomes...
SIR JOHN
Yawp e ki yay, you who seeketh amorous rites with his mother!

And one final example for good measure:

Jules
I just thought it was a cold-blooded thing to say to a motherf----er before I popped a cap in his a--. But I saw some s--- this mornin' made me think twice. See, now I'm thinking: maybe it means you're the evil man. And I'm the righteous man. And Mr. 9mm here... he's the shepherd protecting my righteous a-- in the valley of darkness. Or it could mean you're the righteous man and I'm the shepherd and it's the world that's evil and selfish. And I'd like that. But that s--- ain't the truth. The truth is you're the weak. And I'm the tyranny of evil men. But I'm tryin', Ringo. I'm tryin' real hard to be the shepherd.
...becomes...
JULIAN
Bethought ’twas cold-blooded statement to say to he who seeks amorous rites with his mother ere I stabb'd the rampallian. But some horror this morn made me be hink twice. See, now lest I think: maybe t'means thou art the evil sir. And lest I the righteous  sir. And Sir Nine-Blades hither... the shepherd protect mine righteous fustilarianin self in the dunnest valley. Or could mean thou art the righteous sir and I the shepherd and the ordinary is evil and selfish. I ’twould liketh. ’Tis not true. But the sooth is thy art weak. And I am the tyranny of evil men. Yet I try to be the shepherd.

Publicly tag your best reinterpretations on Facebook and Twitter with #KnavedQuotes. Make sure you post your most creative lines by 10 PM ET on Sunday (12/20/15). We plan to ship the prizes first thing on Monday (12/21/15) so you'll have them for the new year. 

Good luck!

This Book and Shirt will Really Tie the Room Together.

Previous Post Next Post

Comments (1 Comment)

Posted by Anna Janine Bartsch on December 21, 2015

I would like to share a story with you:
It has been 15 years since my dad passed away from a massive heart attack, and I am celebrating my 30th birthday on my parents’ would-have-been 44th wedding anniversary on New Year’s Eve 2015. Yes, that’s a lot of information, and yes, it’s all true.
My dad was the rock of my family; he was everything to us. He was incredibly wise, beyond patient, and studious in his own right. He preferred socks rather than ties for father’s day, worked the newspaper crossword every morning after scrambled eggs for breakfast, and favored Fritos, Orange slices gummies, Planters peanuts, and Mountain Dew for energy snacks. His Sundays involved making rosaries for church ministries while watching NOVA and National Geographic specials because he knew he would never travel to those places in real life. His favorite movies included James Bond and westerns, especially the likes of Sean Connery, Clint Eastwood, and John Wayne, respectfully. I happen to share a lot of these interests, including his knack for math and puzzles.
I tell you all this because I want you to know something:
I liked and followed your Facebook page on a whim, knowing I’m a fan of books and literature as much as the next person, and Novel-T’s were wildly creative and a great way to learn about an author that you may or may not have known existed. When I saw your contest for the Shakespeare Novel-T and “Two Gentlemen of Lebowski” I was immediately interested; within seconds, my mind went from undecided to undoubtedly thinking anything but John Wayne’s McLintock! A classic of the later years of The Duke’s movies, it’s the only John Wayne movie I ever shared watching and completely enjoyed watching with my dad. I was younger, of course, not knowing what all was going on, but I learned all the shenanigans in later years, the occasional, “Oh, that’s what they mean!” comical and mature moments in the film. In the scene I selected, John Wayne, as George Washington McLintock, rolled down the stairs with the attractive maid of the household because he was too drunk to successfully climb the stairs; his red-headed wife, played by Maureen O’Hara, stormed out of the bedroom and saw this maid in his lap at the bottom, exclaiming, “GW!” to which he replied, “Now, Katie, are you going to believe what you see, or what I tell you?” It’s one of two lines in the film that I forever cherish, mainly because they’re funny, but also it reflects John Wayne in his charming, charismatic, witty persona.
In many ways, John Wayne reminds me of my dad – humble, intuitive, compassionate, and overall wonderful well-rounded man. I may not have known my dad in his prime, but what I do know is that he was nothing less than amazing. Despite the few entries I noticed, and though I celebrate his would-have-been 70th birthday on December 17, Christmas #15 without him, and my 30th birthday (Mom & Dad’s wedding anniversary) on December 31 with a healthy mixture of happiness and sadness, I can certainly celebrate that the only John Wayne movie we shared, with the one line that I remember wholeheartedly, that was wittingly translated into a bard-style masterpiece (yes, I am proud of what I created), earned me a right of passage for an autographed copy of “Two Gentlemen of Lebowski” and a Shakespeare baseball tee. For if it had not been for my dad’s love of John Wayne movies, I would not have earned anything at all. It makes this minor yet monumental moment all worth the giddy smile on my face. And for your small act of kindness during this holiday season I am truly blessed and thankful. Best wishes and God bless always; I look forward to purchasing a Poe shirt (#13 happens to be my lucky number, and I love his works)!
With the greatest gratitude,
Anna Janine Bartsch
Avid Reader

Post Comment




Recent Blog Posts

Blog Tags